What Do you Cry For?

I've seen people traveling
in overcrowed trains with their
kids and no place to stand
with a smile on their faces!!!
What do you cry for?

I've seen kids sitting
in straight lines on
footpaths with their
pants down and facing unknown
crowd while pooping
with a smile on their faces!!!
What do you cry for?

I've seen gentle old men
who have lost their
partners for life, who
show no regrets and live life
with a smile on their faces!!!
What do you cry for?

I've seen mothers who
wait patiently for their chlidren to
come home and count every
second, but never sigh a
word of impatience and
carry on with a smile on their faces!!!
What do you cry for?

CHhOoOoOOoOpPPP...

Sometimes I wake up shy, Sometimes confident.
Sometimes I wake up naive, Sometimes  full of wisdom.
Sometimes I wake up serious, Sometimes frivolous.
And Sometimes I wake up Mad ,and I woke up Mad that day.

I opened my eyes and looked at the clock -- 7:58 am
 "F***" my first word for the day."I am late".

I jumped out of my bed.Didn't wash my face.Didn't brush my teeth.Didn't change my T-shirt;
just removed my shorts and wore my favourite pair of faded blue jeans(which were on the
floor)Then realized I wasn't alone in the room. Shanky, my roomie was wide awake
and saw something that he wasn't supposed to see and consequently had a wide grin on his face.
I picked up my shorts threw them on his face ,opened the door of my room and started running like a
street dog in pursuit of a car on the road.

It was mandatory for every student, in my college, to have a minimum of 75% attendence in every subject,
 else he wasn't allowed to  take the test of that subject that semester.Moreover, he had to attend the
classes of that subject during holidays, maintain 75% attendence and then take the test, these classes were
called "ORDIE"(or something like that)classes. I know how it feels like to attend an Ordie class, because in
first year of my college I had to attend one, and believe you me, its not a good experience. When everybody else
is at home, you are in college attending classes,maintaining attendence,taking tests and trying very hard to kill
time  (and sometimes yourself) after the class is over, because nobody else is there with you.In a nutshell,
an ORDIE was my college's version of a solitary confinement

Anyways, I had a lecture on Theory Of Machines' at 8am which I couldn't afford to miss because my attendence was mere 65%.If I had missed even a single class it would have been over.
My college was roughly about 800ms away from the hostel, I ran all those 800ms and finally reached
college(alas! There was no one to clock my sprint,cause it was some kind of a record for sure).
My class was on 3rd floor,I ran through all the stairs and blasted into the class without realizing that teacher
was already in there, and sat on the last bench of the class. Everybody was looking at me and so was the teacher. I was sweating Profusely, and breathing like an asthmatic patient

Teacher: You boy... yes you at the back
Me: F*****
Teacher:What did you say?
Me: Nothing,sir..
Teacher: (looked at his clock)hmmmm.. 8:07am

I thought to myself "WOW.. I AM FAST".

Teacher: Boy, you are too early for the next class.

Everybody burst into laughter.

Me :(quizzically) Sir?
Teacher : Please leave..
Me : (like a peasant in front of his master) Siiiirrrrr..
Teacher : please leave at once, now.
Me : (Like a man begging for his life) Siiiiiiiiiirrrrrrr ...
Teacher : Ok, tell me the reason, why are you  late.
Me : (thinking hard) Ummmm... Sirrr ... ummmm
Teacher : (at the top of his voice) GET OUT, NOW.

Oh boy.. he was angry now, his face told it all, I neither had the courage nor the reasons to ask him for forgiveness. I left the class at once . "Now I'll never get placed, no company will allow a student to sit for  recruitment  who has backlog and to add to that I'll have attend ORDIE classes (sigh)...AWESOME! I AM SCREWED"  I said to myself.

I was very upset and I knew there was only one way to get over it. I took out my cell phone and punched a number

Me : Hello, Hello Lalu.
Lalu : Hello
Me : CHAL PEENE
Lalu : (Sleepy)Abhi.. ??? Its 8:30am
Me : Chal Sham Mein Peene
Lalu : Arre Chal... Jab bol tab chalenge
(guys in the college ,especially mine are ever ready to go for a drink)
Me : Ask others to join us too.
Lalu : sure.

We went to a local bar at 6:30 pm . This was the best bar of the town and played some amazing music.
(For those of you who dont drink,here's a trivia:If the music in the background is good while drinking,the effect of liquor gets amplified ).
Lights were dim and music was aerosmith "DREAM ON" the ambience itself was intoxicating.

While we drank we poured our hearts out, we discussed everything ,our sorrows, faulty education system,politics,universe god,society, Pakistan, China, love, betrayals, girls,sex, Suman Saurabh(DPS,BSCity),  everything. Within 4 hours each one of us(the engineering students) present there were transformed into philosophers.

Uncle's (a friend) cell rang abruptly.
Uncle : hmm ... What?. When?..  How?. Where? Who?  How Many? Ok Ok .. just wait we are on our way.
Uncle : CHAL MAAR HOGAYA HAI. Pandey ka phone aaya tha.

No one asked a single question. Everyone just stood up and and started warming up. I felt as if I were in ancient times and this was a war, everyone was thirsty for adversaries blood, and as we marched  Winnie(another friend) turned back and said something, something motivational and at the end of his speech we shouted in unison         "AAAAAAHHHHOOOOOO",   "AAAAAAHHHHOOOOOO" ,"AAAAAAHHHHOOOOOO"   3 times like The Spartans(from the movie 300). Though, I am not sure if it ("AAHHOO" thing) really happened, I was a " little " drunk you see.

The moment we reached the battle field, I started doing my maths(though I am not good at it) ,I pointed my finger towards them and started counting "1 ,2 ,3... umm 4.. 12 um..", before I could finish somebody pushed me and I lost the count.When you are drunk its very difficult to do maths, so I stopped counting but as far as I remember, on the basis of my cursory  inspection I feel they outnumbered us. I was slowly but gradually slipping into the state of trance,but then I heard a loud voice which woke me up, somebody just said something filthy about one of my friend. He was the leader of the other group
and was marching towards us aggressively with a stump in his hand, he then again opened his mouth  and said something filthier this time .Before anyone in my group could react I pushed myself through the crowd and jumped right in front of him.
I squinted and then widened my eyes just to figure out who he was, but everything was so blurry, he was just a big  6 foot 2inches Bulky Blob for me.

Seeing me standing in front of him, didn't deter him (well.. this was no surprise, how on earth can anybody be detered by Me). Infact I charged him up even more and this time he vomited out the filthiest thing one can think of. It was too much for me to handle ,I was already filled with rage and courage (DUTCH COURAGE Of course, otherwise who would want to mess
with a guy of his size).So, I jumped up, held him by his collar, looked straight into his eyes, bowed him down to my level and shouted at the top my voice  

CHhOOOOoooOOOOooOoOoOPpPPppPP...


That was it, he was shaking, I dont know how but I broke him down. He started sobbing like a little girl.
"Wait a minute.." I said to myself "I know that expression very well", but I was not able to recollect where had I seen it. Bye the bye within 2 minutes The Blob guy and his gang retreated. Everybody came to me , patted my back and said "Great Job Buddy". I didnt reply , my mind was occupied. I was still thinking about his expression. Then suddenly somebody slaped  me on my the back of my head  and I said "EUREKA!!!".
Yes, I remember it now

 FLASHBACK  JULY,1994

MUMMY : CHhOOOOoooOOOOooOoOoOPpPPppPP...
ME : (Sobbing like a little girl)...

It was my mom's  scolding style. This is how she used to scold me everytime I did a mischief or misbehaved or did poorly in my exams et cetera. I never had thaught ,even in the wildest of my dreams , that I would use the same phrase one day in situation like this and chase a Big Blob and his whole gang away. What amused me the most was the fact that this phrase worked even on a guy like the Big Blob. I just cant imagine what would've happened to that guy if my mom would have said that phrase to him .Probabaly he would've died!!.


Life is strange.. isn't it? You can never predict the source of your inspiration.

                                 
                                                                                                                 
                                                                                                                         ABLAZE

                                                     CAST
Shanky ----  Ravi Shankar
Lalu ------- Saurav Singh
Uncle ------- Ritesh Kishore
Pandey  ------ Vibhor Pandey
Winnie  ------- Ashwini Kumar
         And
Suman Saurabh  ------- Suman Saurabh
                                               
 

MY DARK SIDE

MY DARK SIDE
  -------------------

I went to a table which had 8 chairs of which 3 were empty and sat on one of them. There was this south Indian man sitting exactly opposite to me and concentrating hard on the food that he was about to have for lunch. (May be he was trying to meditate or something for better digestion)
The man was probably in his late thirties, two shades darker than a normal north Indian, and just about 0.0025 shade
fairer than an average south Indian (without taking the fairness of an average south Indian female into consideration,
and I am not a racist),standing in at about 5 feet 8 inches tall, weighing in at about 200 pounds, with a
tummy  curvier than all curves of Kim Kardashian taken together, and a
super reflective mirror like space devoid of hair in the centre of his head which was shining
like a newly polished sword of a warrior.

Going by his mannerisms and dressing style , he probably looked like a man, having a
gazillion years of experience in this field. Incidently he had the same food items in his
plate that I had i.e. we both were having the same thali for lunch, "The Health Thali".The Health Thali is a thali
which has 4 compartments, 3 small and 1 big.The small ones generally have
a variety of fruits in one compartment, pulses or chole in the second and dry/sprout chana in the third,
and the large comparment is reserved for rotis and club sandwhich. I generally have The Health Thali for lunch, not
because I am a health freak, but because firstly, the queue is smaller in that shop and secondly and more
importantly, its cheaper (ya... I know what you are thinking!!!I am not cheap)
But looking at this guy ,I think I wasn't wrong in guessing that he was having this thali for reasons completely
opposite to mine, and the reasons apparently being his semi-circular, fluffy tummy which was making me reminiscent of
the Kung fu Panda.

The Old Food Court, where I usually have lunch is an oval shaped place, (which resembles what? I dont know!) is generally
very crowded during the lunch time. Finding a seat during this time here is like finding a penguin in the North Pole. So, as I sat on the chair the man suddenly lost his concentration on the food and noticed me. He waited for five seconds and then in his heavy baritone which was heavily accented, pointed to the chair next to me and said, "Someone is
coming."
I was daydreaming and without paying much attention to what he said I replied, "Yes, I am with a friend and he will be
joining me in a couple of minutes." He nodded his head vehemently like a pendulum and said "No, I mean friends
of mine are going join me here", by which he meant that both the chairs were reserved. Still daydreaming and without
realising what he just said, I said O.K...
Then before his friends, mine arrived at the table and I asked him to sit down. This made the man (sitting opposite to me) very upset. He said, "What is this!" I saw left, I saw right and then looked at him quizzically. He then widened his eyes, looked at me and said, "My friends are coming here." This made
me realise what he was trying to say earlier. Normally I don't like getting in duels, am a calm person who has hardly
ever fought or argued for that matter with anyone.

So like it happens, like a gentleman I should have left the chair and started to search for a new one. But they say
everybody has a dark side, and out of nowhere, mine woke up. I replied to his question by throwing back another which led us to a verbal duel:

Me:  Did you reserve these chairs?
curvy Tummy Man (CTM): What!
Me : DID YOU RESERVE THESE CHAIRS?!
CTM: What do you mean?
Me: Can a person reserve a chair here?
CTM: No one can reserve a chair.
Me: See! Exactly my point.
CTM: You are not supposed to sit on this chair.
Me: Why! did you reserve it?
CTM (upset and angry): I had already told you my friends are coming.
Me: Hmmm, my friend has come first, did you reserve the chair?
CTM (his face turned red): wHAT?
Me: No, see... then first come first serve.

Then he mumbled something in his native tongue to himself and looked at me furiously.
CTM: What is your name?
Me (blank face): ... (silence)
CTM: What is your email id?
Me (blank face): ... (silence)
CTM: What is..
Me (interrupting): Please...i am not in a mood to fight. Let me have my lunch.

He bowed down and made an unsuccessful attempt to see my name on my Id card,
which by the way was very well veiled between my chest  and the table as if it were stratigically placed(on purpose).

Silence for 2 minutes. Then he saw his friends, a lady and a gentelman, coming to this table. This made him super furious.
This time he straightened his backbone and sat as tall as possible, like a snake preparing itslef to attack its prey with
vengeance.

CTM (in a shrill voice again): What is your mail Id?
me (blank face): ...(silence)
CTM (shriller voice): What is your mail id?
me (blank face): ...(silence)
CTM (shrillest this time like an opera singer): What is your...

People in the vicinity realised something happening and diverted their attention to our table.

Me(blank face): Not interested!!!

People started laughing as if I had cracked some kind of a joke. His face turned as red as a tomato.

By this time I saw his friends standing with a plate in their hand 10 feet near the table
unaware of situation here.
This made me feel guilty. I should have left the chair in the first place. I am not the kind of a person who picks up fights,
and that too with a person 15-20 years older than me who could possibly be my boss' friend or even my future boss! I was feeling
guilty, not because I was afraid of him but because I was wrong in the first place. I should have left the chair in the beginning.

My previous answer had made him really furious. Now he stood up and looked at me like a fired up, wounded boxer and clenched
his fists so tight as if he wanted to trap air in it like an air tight container.
I thought its my mistake and its time to apologise. But before I could say anything..

CTM: How dare you  talk to me like that? Huhhhhh... How dare you?!
(he was inhaling and exhaling like a raging bull)


I thought this is the right time, it was my mistake, admit it like a man, apologise. There is nothing to be ashamed of.
Apologise, apologise...

CTM (his words banging my ears suddenly) : HOW DARE...
Me (I interrupted!!!): First things First , I don't appreciate the way you are talking to me.
    Secondly, I am not anwerable to you so you cannot demand me for anything, let alone my mail id.


(In my head)What?!! what did you just say?! I was suppose to apologize...



CTM: You..(I interrupt again!!!)
Me (pointing a finger towards him): Don't you say anymore..

(In my head)I am as shocked as he is. What am I doing.. apologize, apologize..

CTM: Yo....(I interrupt again!!!)
Me (I stand up): CHOOOOOPPPPPPPPPPPPP... (which means "SHUT UP!" in hindi, and also has a story of its own which I'll tell later)

This was too much for him to handle. He stands up, moaning like a lamb. And with his "HEALTH THALI" in one hand and a bag in other leaves the table.

At that moment I thought , what the f***! Who am I? What have I done?! What was that...and took a couple of deep breaths.
I let myself calm down and searched for answers. And finally I realised, this was my "DARK SIDE", my ego which despite
knowing the fact that I was wrong didn't let me do the right thing.

This is an experience which has helped me learn something about controlling myself. Now, I know I may not be able to
control things around, but I can control myself, and if I can control myself I can always control the outcome.

Yes, I have a darkside and I don't like it, but I want to keep it because
I know I can channelise it and use it for the greater good.


;)  ;)